Our Sense of Humor

14 Reasons Why Being a Democrat is Confusing

I am confused.

Lemme see, have I got this straight?

1. President Bill Clinton awards Halliburton no bid contract in Yugoslavia - good...
President George W. Bush awards Halliburton a no-bid contract in Iraq - bad...
2. Clinton spends $77 billion on war in Serbia - good...
Bush spends $87 billion in Iraq - bad...
3. Clinton imposes regime change in Serbia - good...
Bush imposes regime change in Iraq - bad...
4. Clinton bombs Christian Serbs on behalf of Muslim
Albanian terrorists - good...
Bush liberates 25 million from genocidal dictator - bad...
5. Clinton bombs Chinese embassy - good....
Bush bombs terrorist camps - bad....
6. Clinton commits felonies while in office - good...
Bush lands on aircraft carrier in a flight suit - bad...
7. Clinton says mass graves in Serbia - good...
Entire world says WMD in Iraq - bad...
8. No mass graves found in Serbia - good...
No WMD found Iraq - bad...
9. Stock market crashes in 2000 under Clinton - good...
Recession under Bush after 9-11 - bad...
10. Clinton imposes largest tax increase in history -good...
Bush instigates moderate tax cuts for all Americans - bad...
11. Clinton refuses to take custody of Bin Laden - good...
Then World Trade Centers fall under Bush - Bad...
12. Clinton calls for regime change in Iraq - good...
Bush imposes regime change in Iraq - bad...
13. Terrorist training in Afghanistan under Clinton - good...
Bush destroys training camps in Afghanistan - bad...
14. Milosevic not yet convicted - good...
Saddam in custody - bad...
Oh, it's so confusing! I guess I'll never be a Democrat.